May 9, 2008

My mama thoughts...

Happy Mother's Day to all of you! Moms, friends, grandmothers, godmothers, nannies, caregivers... ANY woman who gives of herself to others (as we all do)... should be celebrated!!! These are some of my mama thoughts... observations and joys......

So, you know me... I would love for you to add to this list... I must know what you have learned and love as well!

xoxo, Tracy


* that children bring the greatest perspective one could ask for

* that our SUV has more snacks smashed into the floor than most grocery stores have in their aisles

* that wine was cleverly invented by a mother... and I understand why, and I love her... that brilliant woman

* that being the adult means pig Latin is a good language to learn so you can still communicate incognito with your spouse

* that bouncy balls are evil

* that the word creative must have been invented by a parent

* that I would smell of peanut butter most mornings... and then be scraping the residue off of myself while chatting with someone

* that wet sloppy, drooly kisses right on the lips are most excellent from little children

* that a shaken soda really can hit 4 walls

* that enabling a child does not help them learn

* that I would discover the lioness within... (aka... the I would do anything for them feeling)

* that a full cart of produce tipped over at the grocery store is never a pretty mommy moment

* that questions from a child should often be answered with a question in return

* that family dinners are better than just about anything

* that the day you will never forget is the day they were born

* that projectile is a regular word in a parent's vocabulary

* that private is a non-word for mamas

* that the noise level in our home has nothing to do with what kind of stereo speakers we have

* that not everything in life should get a trophy

* that snuggling heals most

* that being an awesome communicator is more than essential with kids

* that listening is underrated and talking is overrated

* that clean house means it lasts for about 5 minutes

* that kids' art is cooler than any you can buy

* that I really have a loud voice too

* that humble takes on new meaning when you are a parent

* that the dollar store is the kid mecca (and kind of the mama mecca too)

* that socks don't get lost in the dryer, they actually end up scattered all over our house

* that proud has a new meaning when you become a parent

* that guilt is something we do to ourselves (no one is looking that closely)

* that poopie talk would be so commonplace in any home, or with other adults

* that laws should be passed against those little wires that hold new toys in their boxes!

* that playing outside costs no money but is truly invaluable

* that judging someone else's situation is pretty silly stuff in the scheme of life

* that children can still be well-rounded adults even if you never did finish (or start) their journal

* that napping is a fantasy

* that superman really can fly... through chandeliers

* that telling your child you love them and that you are proud of them every day would bring the easiest smile to you both (no matter their or your age!)

* that chicken poop looks a lot like an ice cream swirl to a toddler (yes, really)

* that everything tastes better at grandma's house (I guess I have always known this...)

* that any mama can get ready in about 5 minutes

* that I really am a referee in disguise

* that daddies who change diapers, cook dinner, and pick things up off the stairs on their way up... ROCK!!

* that crying happy tears is just a mama kind of thing

Spectacular vintage doors

Several years ago, when John and I moved from our old farmhouse to a brand new home that we had built in the countryside, I was nervous about losing the charm and character of our old home. You know... all the cracks, crevices, and other nuances that I'd fallen in love with over the years. New construction can be intimidating when you're trying to blend old world charm with modern conveniences... John and I knew we wanted to infuse vintage architectural elements into our new space, to make our home feel as thought it had been around for centuries (but still have TiVo and a dishwasher!!!). For me, these rustic old doors and unique hardware are just one way of bringing vintage character to a newer space.

We found a soulful pair of vintage Asian doors that grace our foyer closet; and an antique set of French doors in the grand style (ornate wood & iron) as the entrance into our great room. We absolutely cherish them there... Even our boys seem to love them, and want to know more about them, since they often use our foyer to build forts and other imaginative worlds inside...

Even if creating a stately entrance (or fort) isn't at the top of your list... there are other cool ways to infuse the character of old doors into your space. Try hinging several old doors together as a charming room divider, or a striking backdrop behind a couch or settee. Why not use them to flank a large picture window, or an interior doorway? (Who says the doors need to open and close??) Other possibilities include turning a single vintage door into a table, desk, or headboard... (And yes, I've done all three!)

Check out the following online treasure troves for vintage doors and antique hardware...

Amighini Architectural Inc.

Eron Johnson Antiques

Architectural Accents

Historic Houseparts

Even if you aren't ready to take the plunge... I hope you find a moment to meander... they're definitely a juicy, visual feast!!

Finding the balance...

I think this is one question I am asked more than any other... The how do you find balance question. I ask my mom about this sometimes... she used to run a company with my father and raised three kids and also was searching for balance. She always seemed so cool and collected to me... made time to get her hair done, was chic and interesting, always put a fabulous meal on the table for a family dinner every night, and still came to all the sporting games, etc! She didn't overthink it... and I am trying to follow in her footsteps!!

I will do my best to demystify what you may think about how I find balance... Perhaps this will stir up even more questions... for all of us. Just know that I, too, am still learning!

Perfection. I ditched the notion of "perfection" long ago. I'm not even sure it was ever a part of me. I knew in life striving for balance was key. I see people that want perfect... and it's a wee bit scary if you ask me. What is perfect anyway?? A lawn with no brown spots? (Who is looking?)... A hair not out of place? (Ewww... a little bed head is far sexier!) No dirt on the floor? (Oh, puleeeazze!!! What is the point of it... too much stress if you ask me.) I'm more of a... this is how I like it, sure it's got its bumps, but at least it is moving forward and in the direction that pleases me... and sister, I am all about "the living"... kind-of-a-girl! Do you read me?? This is my number one rule of finding balance... Perfection is a great ulcer builder.

Date Night. This one is simple... or at least it is to me. I am not saying you need to spend a fortune... but you can certainly benefit from some time with the hubby... or whomever it is you dig! It does take some planning... and possibly some favors. (Grandma... friends...?) I figure in the end it will cost us far less than any marriage counseling would... And really, I love this guy, and being with him (without the kiddies now and again) is something that is a top priority for finding balance. Now if you are a single person, then a date with you and you alone, or whomever, is still a major bonus... good Lord, go see a movie, or get your nails done... but by all means, do something for YOU!!!!

The Clean House. I know... It's my fantasy too. But again, who is looking that closely? I have been known to walk around with a rag and the spray bottle squirting at anything that isn't moving... but, getting all lathered up over the house not being all spiffy is something I did need to learn once our 4 little boys started kicking up the dust. Mind you….I have my "moments"... My are you all kidding me, do I look like I'm your *^%#$@#$&* full-time servant?!?! (moments)... But mostly toys are strewn about... and a row of crumbs seems nearly permanent under the kitchen counter where the boys eat breakfast... and I now have my kids cleaning the toilets (don't worry, non toxic cleaners... yippee!!!) since the stream (the pee-pee stream for those of you with girls) seems to only make it into the bowl partially... the other part flows down the porcelain sides and neatly pools on the ledge and forms a solid layer in a few short hours. (Too much information...?) And the dog is always wet, and then she walks through dirt... Most of the drawers and closets are tidy and organized... but by God I do have junk drawers... and I celebrate them!! Where the hell else do the little things go? Basically, we do our best... and if you came over, you would see a pretty clean house in decent order, with a happy family that is really living there.

Make a Decision. I suppose because time is short I make fairly quick decisions on most everything. I think it helps me move forward on many things without any one thing sitting on my brain and draining the life out of me. Now it's not to say that I don't have major life decisions that need to be pondered... and sometimes a bit of time does help. But generally I don't let the little things... (paint colors, garden this and that, entertaining... blah, blah, blah) sit with me for too long... that just sucks the life out of me.

Don't Get your Undies in a Bundle. We all have things that we get bent out of shape over... and mostly I really try hard be as easy going as I can be. My husband calls me easy going but intense. I am Type A, there is no question, so I have had to learn over the years when and how to push... and when and how to stop... aka, balance!

Be a Planner. This goes hand-in-hand with everything above and allows those things to happen more easily. I am a planner... but I am aware I am NOT an over-planner. This would backfire for me as I need holes in my schedule to feel as human as possible. When too much is in my schedule I start to feel the tilt of balance fall off... and I don't like that feeling. So I try to plan when and where it makes sense for me, for our company, and for our family. I try to see what is directly in front of me, and then down the road and off to the sides. This way I can zig and zag and feel OK with whichever way it all falls.

No Worrying Allowed! Easy to say, I know, but I try very hard to not be a worrier. I find it drains all my energy, and is mostly unnecessary. So I avoid it at all costs. I try to view things in my life as natural progressions, even when they go downhill or become difficult sometimes... and yes, that happens to all of us. I try to see most everything as an opportunity... to learn, to grow, etc. It's easy to assume other people don't have problems that they are dealing with... Believe me, WE ALL DO... It's just a matter of how you choose to view and handle them.

Keep it Simple.
Dinner... entertaining... wardrobe... hair... relationships... plans... life! You may not believe this coming from me, the woman who loves layers... layers of life. But in the midst of it all... I am ever striving to keep it simple... an ever-evolving lesson for me. I will always be learning... but I am pretty sure I've got the hang of it... Well, most of the time!!!

Trays galore!


I am enamored with eclectic trays... everything from antique silver to woven rattan... hand-painted ceramic to wooden inlay... You name it, I collect them... and I truly use them... everywhere! We put together a video to showcase some of the ways I've put trays to use in my kitchen... but you can certainly find a multitude of other ways to display and use trays throughout your home!

Trays are an obsession of mine, for sure... They just help to anchor little vignettes on my counter top. But they aren't just for decoration - they're actually super functional! Each tray helps to organize a range of goodies, keeping them in sight and at my fingertips. So... I have one for oils and vinegars near our cook top. I have another one for soaps and lotions near our kitchen sink. I have yet another one for all my tea essentials (think sugar cubes, spoons, tea packets, honey, etc). I even have one sitting beneath a fabulous urn which holds all of our larger wooden spoons and other kitchen utensils. Plus, as an added bonus, trays make all the "stuff" so simple to move about when cooking, cleaning, entertaining, etc.!

If you don't have a lot of counter space in your kitchen, no worries! Why not keep a small tray on your bathroom counter to hold all of your lotions and potions? Trays and platters make wonderful accent pieces on a side table...just load them up with a small collection of treasured keepsakes. Oversized trays are a great way to keep stacks of magazines in order on your coffee table. Or consider using a beautiful tray at the base of a gorgeous centerpiece in the middle of your dining room table with votive candles sprinkled here and there. You can even hang most trays on your wall with an inexpensive plate hanger or a length of ribbon. The possibilities are truly limitless... I'd love to hear some of your ideas!

Decadent crab appetizer

My dear loves. I know you are ever searching for something tasty to make ahead and keep in your freezer for last-minute feeding frenzies. (This falls into my plan ahead and you'll never be overwhelmed by entertaining theory.) Well, I know you will flip over this dandy! A dear friend of my mother's shared it with her years ago, and is allowing us to share it with you! Thank you Marilyn! This is one of our family's all time favorites... Of course it is remarkably simple, intensely decadent (my favorite kind!), and if you don't pop one in your mouth the instant you put them out on a pretty tray, they will be gone!!! Keep a stash of these on hand this summer... this way you can spend more time chatting with your family!

12 english muffins cut in half
4 Tbs. mayonnaise
2 sticks butter softened (I know... but you will love it!)
1 tsp. garlic salt
1 pound imitation crab or lobster
3 five ounce jars Kraft old English sharp cheese

Combine all ingredients (except muffins) and mix thoroughly. Spread the mixture on the English muffin halves. Cut each muffin into quarters and freeze on cookie sheets. When frozen, transfer to ziplock bags. Broil from frozen state until bubbly.